Today is the two year anniversary of one of the worst days of my life. I remember getting a phone call two years ago that a 5 year old boy in our kids ministry was being rushed to the hospital. I jumped in my car and started to pray. I got to the hospital just minutes after he passed away.
I have never felt anything like I felt as I walked into the ER that day.
I grew up in church my whole life. I was in a church culture that implied that you do not question God because that was doubt and doubt is evil. I have come to understand that God is not surprised by our questions and he is not shaken by our doubts.
I have come over the course of the past two years to realize that faith not touched by doubt is unrealistic. I think that doubt tracks along with faith and the depth of faith is never realized until you are challenged by doubt.
I am so challenged by the faith and love demonstrated by this little boys family. I have watched them walkout their faith, I have prayed with them and cried with them many times. I have seen a faith in them that to this day I wonder if I would have. I still struggle with Trusting God at times. I still think of that boy almost everyday. I now recognize that I don’t know as much as I once thought I did.
And you know what I think that God is just fine with that.
Isa 61:3
To all who mourn in Israel, he will give beauty for ashes, joy instead of mourning, praise instead of despair. For the LORD has planted them like strong and graceful oaks for his own glory. NLT
Here is a link to a post I did a year ago about talking to kids about death.
Thanks so much for the post! It hit me right where I needed to hear it, as I go through a tough time not only spiritually, but emotionally as I question why I do what I do, if I am any good at it, and if I should. Once again, your words inspire me and give me hope. Thanks bro! Even though we have never met, know you have gained a loyal and supportive friend where ever you go, and if you need anything, do not hesitate to ask.
Pastor Sam,
thank you for telling our story,i can’t think of the words or feelings i have for you and the staff and people of mt. zion.all of you have touched our hearts.we didn’t rknow you and everyone was so nice and comforting.that is the true meaning of god.comforting strangers in need.your church and staff and all the people who go to mt.zion should be
proud because you truly are doing gods work.i look forward to joining such a great church.our family loves you all.
always loving and praising god
roberts dad.joe
p.s. my mom said if you have kids hold them tight.listen to my mom.she is wise
Joe,
I have no words……Your faith and trust in God inspires me.
We love you guys more than you know. All of you.
sam
Thanks for sharing such a great story of surviving!